Its that time of year:) Christmas is right around the corner and all the excitement has begun. If you know me at all, you know that Christmas is my favorite holiday and I start celebrating in like October. Christmas cards, Starbucks peppermint mochas, cutting down a tree, snow, gifts, decorating, it all makes me miss my family and all the traditions. It reminds me how thankful I am for them and also for my friends here who have made my second home special. We are preparing for our Christmas show here and I cannot believe its in less than three weeks... The show is taking so much work from Carrie and I. It is a huge project trying to coordinate a couple hundred children in ballet, choir, band, and drama, as well as all of the organization and advertising etc! It is coming together though and I really do have high hopes for the end production. The opening dance has almost one hundred little girls in red sparkling skirts dancing with candles to 'O Come O Come Emmanuel.' It reminds me of when I was little and I pray that Carrie and I will be good role models for these impressionable girls. They truly are such a blessing to me. At the end of each class, I ask one to pray and each time, they steal a bit of my heart. Some of them pray like they really know the Lord and some of them don't even know what Christmas is about or who the Lord is. I struggle finding the balance of teaching ballet in a professional way and wanting to just love on them and tell them about Jesus. Teaching is hard and I have a new respect for all of my teachers. I love what I do, but sometimes I wonder why God put me in this position of so much leadership. It is a challenge and I think God is using it to teach me as well. We are still super excited about the real dance floor that will be installed over break and cannot believe how much grace God has given our bodies dancing on concrete every day. Somehow (God) Carrie and I are still able to dance and perform really well even though we rarely have time to practice. Its been a season of growing our faith.
As the craziness speeds up, I forget to tell everyone little things that happen around here. I forget to tell about the 2nd graders who bring me flowers and the bugs that the boys leave in my desk. Their are so many memories and conversations already that I hope to never forget. Carrie and I spend most of our time drinking coffee and coke, going to the tailor for costumes, obviously teaching, and spending time with friends. We love to watch the Arsenal football games and go out to eat, or hang out and watch movies in our free time. Its been really funny to find out how similar we are in many ways. I am still amazed at how God orchestrated our friendship. Of course we have our differences, but somehow we still like each other:) Its great. Tomorrow is International Day and we are excited to see our girls perform again. Everyone dresses up from where they are from and brings all kinds of food. No one here believes that I am from the US, so I decided to go back to my roots and dress up as if I was an Italian mafia member. Hah. Anyways, I also wanted to tell everyone that God is already answering the prayers I asked for in my last blog. All of our shows are going well and most everything we prayed for is coming together. Please keep praying! A huge surprise to me (shows how little my faith is) was that our church Flood got all of the money they needed for land right on time. God has provided so much and I am confident He will continue to do so. Other things we have been up to would include shopping and enjoying packages from home:) I cannot even say how exciting those are. We also went to take care of babies at a Crisis Nursery this weekend. I loved it so much and had so much fun playing with them. They all need people who love them and its hard to leave and have to say goodbye. I really do have a problem. I love kids way too much and think all of them are so beautiful. I wish I could go more often.
On that note, God has been teaching me about ministry. When trying to figure out what ministry is exactly, I came across this 'definition.' “Let every man abide in the calling wherein he is called and his work will be as sacred as the work of the ministry. It is not what a man does that determines whether his work is sacred or secular, it is why he does it.” ― A.W. Tozer
I have realized that I always want to go out and do ministry. We are called to go and sadly most of us shy away from that when its hard. However, what about the ministry we can do right where we are? I've always known that you can be a "missionary" anywhere. My dad was an amazing role model of that. Practically though, how does that look? I am not trying to say its bad to go out and do missions, I just think that I overlook opportunities that are right in front of me. My ballet studio is my missions field and to not use it as that at all times is to take for granted what the Lord has given me to use for His glory. God has given each of His kids different abilities and I think it is so cool to see God work through different avenues and tools. Each avenue reaches a different person and I want to start looking for that more and more. I love joining others in their fields, but I really want to take advantage of the moments flying past me every day. We have this view sometimes, or at least I do where I think some people get to do "cooler" missions than others. The funny thing is that we are all called to the same thing and the "sillier" your "calling" is, the more glory you can give to the Lord. I want to get to the point where even if God called me to do something that other Christians thought was unimportant and everyone looked down on me, I would still do it joyfully. I am not there. Yet. Hopefully I will be someday... when I am old and grey:) The thing is that God wants His kids to infiltrate every world. He puts some of us in sports, arts, government, medicine, education, etc. He also puts us in places that people don't look up at. Everyone thinks its so cool to move to a foreign country to follow God, but what about working a simple job in your home town where no one sees your heart for the Lord except your coworkers that God has put you there for. It comes down to why are we interested in missions and what are we trying to do when we share our God with the lost? I should desire His glory above all. It is easy to be distracted and lose focus on the real reason we "go"... the cross.
I apologize for the length of this blog. I hope it makes sense and that it does not bore you. Its been a while and I am just kind of spitting out all that has been on my mind lately. I want to share one more thing that God has been teaching me. God takes us through so many different seasons. There are seasons of refining, seasons of growing, seasons of cutting, seasons of learning, etc. It is easy for me to try to rush those seasons, trying to get to the next one as soon as possible. I like to move on to the next lesson almost like its a race. Sometimes though, you have to slow down. God is so patient, I do not understand at all. He always teaches us things in the specific way we need and in the perfect time. Sometimes, we do not know what He is showing us until we are in the next season looking back at the one before us and reflecting on lessons that we now understand. Its hard to not know what we are being taught and can be so frustrating. It makes me feel stuck. Maybe I need a lesson in patience... :) Anyways, I just think that God knows what He is doing and if He holds our wandering hearts to Himself, then He will be faithful in teaching us what we need when we need it. So, even when we are left in the dark- not understanding for a bit, in the end His light-truth will make all things clear.
Thank you all so very much for you care and support! It is humbling to know so many are praying for us. It means more to us than you know. Please continue to pray for all the things listed in our last blog post. I will write another post after our show to let you know how it goes! Please, more than anything, pray that the gospel will reach people through the program. That will make all the work worth it. I love you all and am praying for you as well! Check out Carrie's blog soon!
Em
"If Christ is not all to you, He is nothing to you. He will never go into partnership as a part Saviour of men. If He be something, He must be everything, and if He be not everything, He is nothing to you."
----Spurgeon
